May 24, 2010

'Twas the Night Before New Meadowlands...

OMFG this made me LAUGH like no other...I love it!!

From and Glenn Osrin, comes a Bon Jovi parody on 'Twas the Night Before Christmas'.

I'm all packed and ready to go -- flight leaves at 11am tomorrow! I will arrive in Newark around 9pm EST and staying with a friend from Backstage (smoochies to Jen!). Then let the touring, partying, times with friends, and BON JOVI begin!

Don't forget to follow the blog I set up for my adventures (the link is on the left sidebar), and of course watch this space too. Safe travels to those of you flying in this week, and maybe I'll see some of you there!

And now, enjoy:

'Twas the Night Before New Meadowlands'

'Twas the night before New Meadowlands, when all through the land,
Bon Jovi fans were stirring, hungry for their band.
The new stadium was prepped with the utmost of care,
For soon it would be christened; Bon Jovi would be there!

Fans far and wide toss and turn in their beds,
With visions of Jon’s butt-cheeks dancing in their heads.
And Mama sporting her Jovi tee and Uncle in his cap,
Why Auntie Gina even fantasizes about sitting on Jon’s lap!

For soon up on stage Rock-n-Roll it will clatter,
Windows and doors throughout Jersey, surely will shatter!
When the band takes the stage camera phones they will flash,
As Bon Jovi and the boys kick some Rock-n-Roll ass!

New Meadowlands will shine, shake and shimmer in the night,
Only Bon Jovi’s million-megawatt smile could be brighter than lights!
When what to JoviNation’s wondering eyes will appear,
But that gorgeous Rock God, singin’ and shakin’ his rear!

With Richie on guitar, so lively and quick,
Fans will know in a moment, this is no ordinary schtick!
More powerful than meteors, his bandmates they’ll play,
Jon will shimmy and shout and call them by name.

“Now Richie, now Dave, now Tico and Hugh,
We’ve New Meadowlands to christen! We’ve got rockin’ to do!
We’re gonna rock til we drop!
We’ll loosen the walls!
We’re gonna rock away rock away rock away ALL.”

“The notes we will sing, the screams they will fly
Why it might be enough, to bring a tear to my eye
And just when you think this old rock band is through
We’re gonna do three encores, especially for you!”

“The Circle will be packed, this ain’t no time to goof
They’ll be scratching and pawing at my rooty-toot-toot.
I’ll sing til I’m dizzy, til I’m spinning around,
We’re gonna break in New Meadowlands, plant it firm in the ground.”

Oh Jon’s eyes how they’ll twinkle! His dimples how merry!
Richie will be striking Vox poses while the band brings it heavy.
And with smiles just as wide as their faces will go,
They’ll bring down the house with this yard-party show.

The mic he will kiss with his lips and his teeth,
A halo of sweat and steam will circle his head,
And look just like a wreath!
Dave will tinkle the ivories,
Tico pounding the beat;
To the critics they’ll prove
No disbelievers allowed in the seats!

With a wink of Jon’s eye and a twist of his head,
60,000 fans will have nothing to dread.
He’ll sing every word, Rock-n-Roll ain't just work!
He’ll kiss all the girls and make jealous hubby’s feel like jerks!

Then raising his hand one more time to his ear,
He and the band will approach center stage as shows end the fans fear.
Hands raised triumphantly in the air
And we’ll hear them exclaim as they dash off the stage to the limos in the night
"Blame it on the love of rock n roll, New Meadlowlands!
And to all a good night!"

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